Prime

Funny word.

Prime numbers - indivisible.

Prime beef - the best.

Primitive - I guess there's the sense of original or first?

Premium - best.

Premier - best.

When I was 17... just before I turned 18... I was accepted to Oxford the first time. I remember speaking on the phone in the upstairs hall and both of my parents congratulating me. Dr. John Kelly made the call. I think it was Christmas Eve.

Earlier that year, I think, I had recovered from anorexia... I ate chocolates at Easter with my friend Amanda watching Gone With the Wind. I'm not sure how much I liked it, but it was good to be with her. Watching TV in the daytime in dressing gowns. My parents were away. I'd been to a study week in Manchester... that year, I think... and I think that was with Amanda. I'd been skiing. Not so successful. A school trip. I was scared. The porridge was really good though. And my mother had loaded my suitcase with chocolate bars from Marks and Spencer. Because I was so thin.

I think I went to America too... though maybe that was the year after... my mother wanted me to retain my Green Card. She thought I could work for the State Department. She thought I was a natural diplomat but I did the test thing at school and it said I should be an accountant!

I still had my Siamese, Solomon, I think... though he may have disappeared that year. And the pony Syringa, and the cob Saffron and the mare Sylko. I'd stopped riding though. I hated to see the horses. I'd lost my love! Sounds familiar.

I think I'd had my first romantic loves - Simon Crockett, who went off with my friend Rachel, and Stefano Hatfield, who went off with my friend Gaby. They were both pretty and vivacious. Rachel had big breasts, Gaby was tiny and stunning - half Mexican and talented at everything. She went to Cambridge. Did art and music and spoke four languages. Worked for a newspaper. Don't know about Rachel. Have in mind a job in the local council. I can see all their faces so clearly.

At seventeen, I never thought I'd be fifty.