It's worse than fungus-like outgrowths of misery. It's a blow to the ego and a whip to the system.
I've had my feedback from Ben for my draft essay about human enhancement. Turns out it's far, far worse than was the one about the squirrel. Which I have rewritten ten times since the feedback on that.
So, I am unconvincing, ungenerous and internally contradictory. The latter point is not apt as it's just he didn't understand the point I was making - so, scratch 'internally contradictory' and put in 'unclear'. The awe and wonder stuff is all irrelevant.
This is, it has to be said, depressing.
I thought I might be a philosophical genius. Really. I thought I might be. Just like I thought I might be a TV superstar and a dressage diva and a radio personality and a painting talent and a bestselling fiction writer. Turns out that I'm not.
Well.
It's supposed to be about the learning and the journey and the self-development.
FUCK THAT!
I want the glory and the prestige and the riches! I want newspaper feature interviews with flattering photographs and admiring paragraphs of praise and respect.
Really. Does anyone do anything, invest real effort, just to be mediocre?
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