Although I was going to return to the Reserve for the fourth day in a row, I decided to visit the copse and my dying poplar.
As I consider the aspects of the poplar's transformation magic, I think of the transformation, now, not of me but of Man. Instead of thinking of me-caterpillar becoming me-butterfly, what if Man-Anthropos became Stone? What if the magic is the magic of Medusa? A Gorgon vision of the Capitalocene ossifying, petrifying, ceding its energy to the Earth-beings, the Chthonic ones? If this sounds like a feminist, anti-capitalist mission statement, see here for a more forceful approach by Donna Haraway.
My mission statement is inspired by a journey encouraged by the Asia Suler exercises. My intention was to meet guides who could show me how to embrace my purpose. At the axis mundi, I asked for allies. There was Crow and then Lynx, Bear, Fox and Hare arrived. Suddenly I was surrounded by all that is or was of flying, walking, hopping, jumping, rooted, grounded, digging and mining. They were all there, even the pterosaurs, encouraging me to go. Hornet flew to me, with a buzzing brushing past, signally no danger, just encouragement.
And suddenly a viper approached me closer than all else and she wound herself around me, diamond-backed and tongue flicking, her eyes like polished stones. She was to be my guide. Her name was, unexpectedly, Sissy. I was to go down and down, but I struggled to focus and Sissy had me access the ecstasy of a hawk tuned in to prey, the laser focus and intent. I felt the life-enhancing rush of complete concentration and we went down.
And the cave went from coal to gems of red, blue, green, white and then a polished black with starling-iridescence and there was a boar, bigger than a bull. I was, I must admit, disappointed. But Boar took me within himself to experience the exquisite sensitivity of bristled skin and the pleasures of the perfumed world and the sensual pleasure of being touched and scenting the sweetness of Earth's living body. And I understood how bodies can be the most sensitive receptors. And that made the cruelty of our treatment of pigs all the more painful to consider.
Once I could appreciate body, I was taken deeper and there, in a huge hall, a blue figure, transparent, an old king. The Forgotten King. He said he (and the Queen) were the holders of the greatest matterings. I said, "I didn't expect the King of the Chthulucene to look like a human. Or to be male." He said he takes the form of whomever approaches, for quicker connection. He said the Queen, whom I then saw, but only as vapour, a mist, was no less important than he, perhaps more so, just more forgotten. No one asks for them, and so they lose their life-force. I asked why the other life-forms didn't keep their presence strong and he said the other life-forms are under such stress or in such reduced numbers or bred away from their core selves that they too lose the habit of questing. I asked why I had been able to see him and see, only just but even that was incredibly rare, the Queen. He said I could not have done so without the extraction of the fat spider-like thing. (Not a spider, I was told: there is nothing bad about spiders.)
"So, what can I do?" I ask.
The King and Queen speak through Sissy, who says, "Think of binding. Don't cut. You lose the complexity and nothing holds together, it breaks apart. Bind. Encourage all to grow together"
And I recalled winding together honeysuckle strands when I wanted, the day before, to clear headroom. I had not considered cutting them. I plaited them into thicker swathes away from the path.
"Is this why my guide is a snake?" I asked.
She answered, "Twining, and shedding skin, and being in contact with Earth. A creature of the Chthulucene."
And I said, "It is hard for me to trust you. All our cultures fear snakes."
"Overcome your culture," she said. "Shed it like a skin."
I return to the surface and there all the Earth-beings are happy. They feel I have achieved something.
I have at least brought back a story.
Very fine storytelling. And I especially love Sissy the Snake 🐍 xx